Eventually I want to put my original thoughts onto paper on this subject of patience with women. I have recently been having a lot of discussions with Mike Stoute about this. Trying to remind him how important patience is in a seduction. Anyway, this is a good post by the guys at pickup arts.

 Patience with Women by Jay Valens

“The well fed man always keeps his table manners.”

I like this quote, which I just came up with in order to help

illustrate the point of this newsletter. If we equate hunger for

food to the desire to have sex, then this quote nicely sums up how

I believe a man should act around a woman.

You see, the average guy has a killer desire for sex, and while

this is very natural, displaying it too overtly with a lack of

patience is the wrong thing to do in 95% of cases.

It is a delicate balancing act that a man has to do, but you have

to sub-communicate to women under the surface that you want and

expect that you will be having sex with her, but if this message

becomes too overt at any time it backfires.

Why?

Back we go to the foo d example. If you are starved for food, I

mean really salivating, slobbering on yourself desperate to eat

type starvation, it is going to be obvious to all around you. You

will be like a walking sign saying “I AM NOT GETTING ANY FOOD AND I NEED SOME NOW!” More…

People will come to their own conclusions about why you are not

getting any food. Maybe you are homeless, destitute, a criminal,

etc. Obviously these are not good associations.

In a case like this, most people will shy away from giving you food

outside of anything but pity. And if they did give you some food

they would be unlikely to want to stay around and eat with you as

you would probably be scarfing it down like a madman showing no

care for manners.

Now take the analogy to interaction with a woman. If you show a

lack of patience and seem to be angling too hard for sex, it will

be like you are shouting “I AM NOT GETTING ANY SEX AND I NEED SOME NOW!”

She will be thinking on either a conscious or subconscious level,

“why is this guy so desperate for sex, is there something wrong

with him? Maybe he is bad in bed, or something else?” She might

also think that if you are so desperate then the sex will be an

unpleasant experience for her as you will likely be in a hurry,

much like eating with the starved man in our example above.

Instead by showing patience, even to the point of being the one who

slows down the action, you will make her wonder the opposite.

“This guy must be very good with women, he must have his choice of

women and that is why he is in no hurry with me. I hope he likes

me, I bet he is slow and good in bed too…”

Now, just in case you think this applies only to how you proceed

sexually with a woman, realize that you need to show patience and

control in general around women.

Let’s say you are behind a slow driver on the street. If you are

yelling and cussing at him to get moving, she will equate that lack

of patience to the same lack of patience in bed.

It doesn’t matter where you are or what you are doing, lack of

patience outside of the bedroom will be equated to lack of patience

inside the bedroom by women.

There is a great story that you might have heard that also sums up

the message of this newsletter.

Two horny bulls are standing at the top of a large hill, a young

bull and an old bull.

They look down the hill and see lots of cows grazing in the green

fields below.

The young bull says with excitement to the old bull, “Lets run down

this hill and have sex with one of those cows!”

The old wise bull turns to him and calmly says, “No… let’s walk

down the hill and have sex with them all.”

So there you have it, be the smart bull and always move smoothly

and patiently with women.

The only place I advise against patience is when it comes to

getting better with women. And a great way to do that is through

our “The Art of the Pickup” DVDs.

Your patient coach,

Ray Devans

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