Sure, it’s easy to focus on the annoying part of owning a dog… cleaning up crap, chewed up socks, expensive vet visits… but these are just the small price you have to pay for the life changing benefits that come with shacking up with man’s best friend.
1. More Exercise. This dog is guaranteed to be a bundle of energy. He will always be up for a jog in the park, a game of Frisbee, tug of war, or tag. If you indulged his desire to constantly be playing you’ll shed those extra five pounds in a matter of weeks.
2. Great Wingman. Two guys are strolling down the street. A hot girl comes walking from the opposite direction. Who does she stop and talk to? Run out of conversation at a bar? Pull out your cell phone and spend 10 minutes showing pictures of
your dog, and telling cute stories about it. Bring a girl back to your place… no easier way to make a girl comfortable then by seeing the love your little pooch has for you.
3. Perfect Support System. Some girl broke your heart? Who else is going to sit unconditionally by you and never once say “I told you so.” Yes, no matter how bad things get this little guy will always be there wagging his tail when you get home. He doesn’t care if you’re just getting back from a three day coke and hooker bender… he loves you just the same.
4. A reminder that life doesn’t have to be complicated. Jobs, relationships, anxieties… these are just human problems. The pooch does what he wants; when he wants. When you’re stressed out over a deadline, he’ll remind you that there is always time to squeeze in a quick game of fetch. When you’re broke as a joke… he’ll remind you that the food you’re eating still tastes a boat load better than his.
5. He’s a constant reminder to put off having kids as long as possible. When you start feeling your biological clock ticking… you just need to spend five minutes looking down at that attention starved, time stealing, money draining, furniture ruining mut… and realize that he’s still one hundred less than work than the kid would be.
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July 3, 2008
Hahaha…. good article!
Gonna get a dog as soon as I move out.
July 3, 2008
Bobby, you forgot the $50 trip to the groomer every 2 months…but yeah, a dog is great for not only women, but everything else you pointed out. I guess I should say that you MUST put the time in to train it.
You should also take into account the breed. A lot of women are put off by bigger dogs. I’ve had a cocker spaniel for 6 years. After she was trained I used to take her to classes with me. I was in a relationship at the time but looking back I can’t believe how money that was. She’d just lay there and mind her own business, but girls, guys and even my professors would come and play with her.
July 3, 2008
Dogs definitely make it easy to draw girls in. A friend of mine just moved near Harvard Square with his little Boston Terrier. She’s less then a year old and basically my buddy cleans up whenever he takes the dog out for a walk. It’s ridiculous!
Matt Savage’s last blog post..How Online Dating is Like Space Exploration
July 3, 2008
@Matt
Thats the same dog I have (male), hence the first picture..
July 3, 2008
What about a cat? lol. My cousin had a cat that she walked on a leash…. but it was blind in one eye…. and deaf…. really, lol.
July 3, 2008
I can’t believe how great of a conversation starter Dogs can be. I’ve even approached women who had dogs themselves.
-Seraf
July 4, 2008
Point 5. is strange. Where does this negative attitude towards kids come from? Maybe You don’t want kids, but giving dogs a big list of negative adjectives and then telling kids are worse is a strange attitude.
Maybe You should review Your inner game, dude!
Hong Kong’s last blog post..Cantonese learning resources
July 5, 2008
I don’t know about you all, but I find Hong Kong’s comment to be remotely hilarious.
July 5, 2008
everyone knows a PUA’s best friend is a cat. Get a girl though because male cats are little assholes.
If you go up to them wanting love they’re all like “fuck off”. You put one on your lap and then they’re gone as soon as you take your hands off. But if you ignore them and dangle shiny things in front of them they go nuts. And when you do your thing and don’t focus on them, they come to you. Sound familiar?